USA Today By Craig Wilson

It seems there's a new dog book out every 20 seconds. Some are better than others, of course. Just like their subjects.

But Jeanette Wright's book , Men Are Dogs, intrigues me because she claims we can get to know the men in our lives better by their breed.

Not the breed they own. The breed they are.

She says comparing breeds and their characteristics even can be extended to presidential candidates. George W. Bush, for instance, is an Irish setter.Wright says he fits all the qualities of the breed: refined, outstanding gentleman; playful, even clownish; loyal and devoted; great family man. And as an Irish setter, Bush covers a lot of ground, searching. Once he finds what he's looking for, he lets others know; then he sits back and lets them take over.“It's easy to like him,” she says. He may appear slow, perhaps even stupid, but he's not. He's just easily distracted and can become self-absorbed. That makes him somewhat tough to train.” Vice President Dick Cheney, by the way, is a no-nonsense schnauzer. So what does that make John Kerry? A German shepherd. Kerry is protective and likes to herd others, Wright says.

During the Vietnam war, he won several honors for risking his life to protect his fellow soldiers, and as a senator he encourages others to follow his lead and pay attention to the issues he thinks are important.

Socially, though, he's more awkward than the easygoing Irish setter, Wright says. His demeanor and commitment to being a protector make him appear distant and serious.

And Ralph Nader? It's not surprising Wright has dubbed him a bull terrier. Tenacious, he's willing to take on anyone in the name of justice.

“Once he does, look out, because he won't back down,” she says. “He thinks for himself, thank you very much.”

So there are our choices. A playful Irish setter backed up by a schnauzer, a disciplined but socially challenged German shepherd or a bull terrier with a mind of his own.

Any dog lover will tell you, of course, this is insulting to our four-legged friends everywhere. Dogs always have had more integrity and been more trustworthy than any politician, even if they do mark their territory and nip at one another on occasion.

But Wright's theories got me thinking. Even though I love my Wheaten terrier, Murphy, I don't think I could vote for her in good conscience. She's too high-strung. Besides, she'd pay no attention at Cabinet meetings, unless, of course, one of her Secretaries fed her under the table.

And I certainly wouldn't vote for my brother's pug, Otis. Four years of that kind of snorting hyperactivity would leave the nation exhausted.

Instead, I think I'd vote for a mutt, the guy in the park who gets along with everyone in the world, the live-and-let-live candidate, just happy to be alive. Problem is, there's not one in the park.

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